friends? relationships?

friends are very, very important to me and i do value friendship a lot.
i used to value friendship even more than relationship.
yes, i put my friends before my boyfriend.
simply because i once used to tell myself that friends are those who always stay by us.
before we find our other halves, we spent most if not all of our time with our friends.
even in a relationship, we go to our friends when things get bumpy with our other halves.
when the relationship ended, again we go to our friends.
you see, friends are those who never once leave you no matter what situation you're in.

but i guess as i grow up, things aren't the same as my perceptions.
friends do leave, especially when they find their other halves.
girl friends leave because they no longer have much time for you as it used to be.
boy friends leave because their girlfriends get jealous over your close friendship (if you're a girl) with the guy.

i've been in these situations a few times before and yet it still breaks my heart each time it happens.
i just don't get how people's minds work.
have you forgotten who was the one who encouraged you and advised you when your relationship with your boyfriend/girlfriend gets bumpy?
have you forgotten who stuck by you before you get your boyfriend/girlfriend?
and this applies to both the girlfriend and boyfriend, if you're a friend of both. and yet the girl can still get jealous over your friendship with her boyfriend when you were the middle person for both.

i just don't understand how can people change so drastically right after they get their other halves.

maybe i'm just a fool for valuing friendship more than relationship because clearly, my boyfriend will never leave me like how my friends left me.

if i could, i would erase all the memories we once had when we were close friends.
what makes me even more upset is that i was a close friend to this guy already even before they coupled.

as usual, i'm always a nobody when i am of no use anymore.

why do this have to  bloody repeat all the time? fuck it.